My Son…..


My Son, Elliot is very cool.  He is always full of a lot of energy.  What boy isn’t.  He is very good at math and like rocks, stars and all the normal boy stuff.

The one thing that my son is, is a part of me.   When I was growing up in Billings, Mt in the 70′s & 80′s I was different.  I learned differently.  I was in those class rooms where the special kids went.  I went to the Read Resources Room and got extra help.  I had a very hard time learning and studying.  I still do to this day.  I know that I process information at a different rate and process.  It takes me time to think of what to say.

Like my son, I am also very hyper focused and cannot sit still for a long time.  I see that in me and I see it in my son.

My son has some form of ADD or ADHD or something else.  He was also diagnosed with Asperger’s.  It’s on the Autism Spectrum……

WHAT? AUTISM? WHAT? NOT MY KID! WTF….
Yup, that’s how I felt when I heard that.  Right off the bat I got very defensive.  I had family members asking me point-blank about Autism and everything.  I had not a clue.  What I Googled, was not the whole picture.  The email lists that I got on scared the crap out of me.  There are some seriously affected kids with Autism.  What I have come to find out that my son is a very highly functioning boys with Asperger’s, that has ADD/ADHA.  (Really it’s so mild with everything thrown in the Doctor says he classified him one way just for insurance.)

So, my son is not normal.  Whose kid isn’t.  My son just learns differently.  We need to watch what he eats, (SUGAR IS NOT GOOD!) and what his mood is like.  There are complexities of what is normal to you and I that he does not get.  Which I fully relate to.

I figure that if I had stayed in Boy Scouts and went through all the Merit Badges, I would have a lot more knowledge about everyday things that I just do not have.  With my son, I know that this is going to help him.

Why am I saying all this….Not all boys are the same.  Some learn differently from others.  Some need extra help.  Some just cannot help the way that they are wired.  In the world of Scouting, learning about how boys think and operate is huge. If one can work with boys to find their potential, then that boys thrives.

With my son, we are still working at it.  We keep trying many different things.  Not all work.  Not all days are good.  There are some days that are just fantastic.

I forget about Aspergers, ADD & ADHA.  I do not even think about being on the Autism Spectrum.  However, I do realize that my son comes from me, and I realize that I am him at his age.

4 thoughts on “My Son…..”

  1. Wanted to thank you for pointing me to this post! I completely understand this, and you are right, it is a help in that I feel I am not alone. My boy is also “different.” We are only embarking on the journey of diagnosis now that he is almost 8, but there is little doubt in my mind that he is ADHD, and he does have some sensory integration issues, though not severe enough to be labeled as spectrum, because he can show emotion, so sayeth the myriad of therapists we have used over the years. For my boy, he is also extremely gifted, and when you combine all of that, it makes things incredibly interesting! I am very, very glad I have read your posting on this, because I know I am not alone!

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  2. WOW – what can I say. I truly believe that scouting has helped my son although his issues were different, being gifted, and yet no one could help me figure it all out until he was in middle school. The stories I could tell. With my family, we may seem like we spend a lot of time scouting, and helping others, but we do it together and I wish more moms join in with their husbands and sons and support them in the adventure of growing, learning and exploring. I do it so I can watch from the sidelines and still enjoy the fun, fellowship and unique things they discover and learn along with them. I spend my work days working with those who don’t fit in the box, lots of behavior issues, and those needing specially designed instruction, but when you remove the walls of a classroom, there is a lot more there to offer and see within each child. Its amazing what a little fresh air, and dirt can do for kids. I wish you all the best, and keep on doing what you do best! Peace!

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